Listen, Open Up, Value, & Encourage

What matters more: getting better or getting even?

One critical idea, every good team shies away from discussing in the locker room is love. 

Great teams, those who go on to accomplish great feats under great pressure in great moments, weave love into the fabric of their culture.

Conceptually, the word love means: to make better. Competing with love means to approach your sport, your craft, and your team with an underlying attitude of betterment.

The reason love is oftentimes depressed and suppressed rather than expressed is because it’s hard! It requires vulnerability. It demands exposing oneself to the possibility of embarrassment, scrutiny, and rejection. The fear of rejection is among the top three fears any human being has.

Are you gonna go all out? Or are you gonna hold back? 

Are you seeking and speaking the truth, your truth, or sugarcoating to avoid any turbulence? Are you more afraid of what someone else thinks and what someone else says, or of losing because you deliberately chose not to communicate honestly and openly?

For roughly two decades, I oftentimes decided to cheer rather than to confront. Why? Because short-term tranquility seemed optimal. Because I didn’t understand the long-term consequences of sweeping problems under the rug — issues delayed... multiply. Because I was more concerned with how I made someone feel than expressing my true thoughts and feelings.

Now conscious of any subconsciously-driven sugarcoating, I’m more aware of who I am and what I must say going forward. 

Great teams are comprised of honest-oriented individuals who behave with integrity and align their words with their worlds. Great teams commit to sharing and receiving each other's truths. Among all the great teams I’ve been a part of and studied, they all embody the following sentiment: "Love wins one-goal games."

Communicate. Remain open-minded. Ask questions and listen. 

Love requires the hard right over the easy wrong. Love requires turning toward with a warm heart rather than turning away with a cold shoulder. And sometimes, love requires heated dialogue to gel as one and become more together. 

Where in our lives are we letting things slide?

Who has not respected nor recognized us enough in a while?

Who have we not respected nor recognized?